


It's All About Sex

by afteriwake



Series: In So Few Words [62]
Category: CSI: NY
Genre: Adam Feels Pathetic, Co-workers, Gen, POV First Person, Sex, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-19
Updated: 2012-09-19
Packaged: 2017-11-14 15:30:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/516840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam's thoughts on how he feels left out in the lab gossip.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's All About Sex

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in season 2. This was an answer to a prompt from **10_inspirations** (Phrases #15, " _Everybody Lies_ ") and **35_fantasies** (#12, " _Another Language_ ") for my friend **dragonessasmith**.

_Everyone else has had more sex than me_  
Does anyone else get that feeling?  
TISM, "Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me"  


It's strange, walking around the labs and knowing that each and every person there is lying about something. There's one facet in their life that they lie about or keep hidden behind half-truths and omissions. But however they're doing it, they're lying.

For me, it's about sex. It's all about sex, really: who's having it, who's not, and who feels pathetic because they think everyone else _is_. As PC as the labs can be, there's still locker room talk about dates and getting laid and things like that. I'm not inexperienced; when I told Danny one time I'd dated a Suicide Girl, I hadn't lied. That, to this day, was the most significant sexual experience I've ever had. Most unique, too. Plus it gives me a one-up over most guys when they brag.

But the point is, I've started to feel like everyone's having more sex than me. And the locker room talk isn't really helping; it's like I'm standing in a room and everyone's talking this different language that I sort of get but not really.

I think I was surprised that the two who used to brag all the time are the two staying quiet. Danny I kind of guessed about, considering the whole thing with Lindsay, but Flack was a surprise. Maybe there's more going on with him then he's saying, but...I don't know. I still think he's getting laid more than I am. He probably is and is being a gentleman like Hawkes, the only guy I know who _doesn’t_ brag. Of course, he never brags about _anything_ , so...

And the worst part is I look at a lot of the guys and think I just don't measure up. Like I'm not worthy, you know? Maybe it's me and my rambly thoughts, I don't know. Maybe I'm just not getting what's being talked about around me, or maybe I don't _want_ to get it. I don't know, and I probably shouldn't care but I do. And that's what sucks: this stuff should just roll off my back and it doesn't. It ruffles me and bothers me until I'm thoroughly convinced that every male in the labs is getting sex _but_ me.

Either that or they're all lying through their teeth.

I'm sort of hoping it's the latter. Then maybe I won't feel so pathetic.

And I hate feeling pathetic . It makes me feel...pathetic. I mean, I could probably come up with a different word, one that makes me sound as educated as I am, but "pathetic" fits perfectly. And that's the worst part...any other word I come up with is going to basically be a synonym for pathetic.

I think what makes it even worse it that when it comes to bragging, sex is one of the biggest topics and _everyone_ lies about it at some point. I haven’t met anyone yet who told the truth about their sexual escapades 100% of the time, and I honestly doubt I ever will.

And that’s pretty disheartening.

But I have this single solitary fact to comfort me, though: far as I know, Messer's not getting laid, either.


End file.
